LORI WRAY, 1962- 2021
I was heartbroken to hear about the passing of my friend Lori Wray recently. She leaves behind countless people sad to lose her-- a caring, witty, hilarious friend, and a brilliant songwriter and vocalist. I’m blessed to have had the opportunity to know her and collaborate with her— she was one of the most talented musicians I’ve ever worked with, and a loyal ally in life. Singing with her was incredible, and hanging out with her was a blast.
Lori was funny, and smart, and well read, and a devoted cat person. As a musician and songwriter, she “got it”, if you know what I mean. Her voice had a depth and poignance to it, but also an arch wit. Her compositions, informed by an exhaustive study of pop songwriting, often evoked a relatable melancholy. But listening back to them recently, I’m struck by how much they chronicle a struggle simply to be happy, and that makes me love them all the more.
I'm glad I got to see her perform at a St Paul in-store one last time in 2019. It was the kind of a show that was, somehow, very Lori— an informal affair, a bunch of people hanging out, running into friends they hadn’t seen in far too long, listening to some songs, sipping discreet drinks, chatting and laughing at the onstage banter in between. Her husband Dan’s frenetic collage artwork— the performance was in honor of his art show’s opening— offered the perfect visual counterpoint up and down the walls. (He also took the photo of Lori above. Hope it’s OK that I used that, Dan.) I wish it hadn’t been the last time I saw her sing, but if that’s the memory I have to hold as such, I’ll take it.
I’m also happy I was in touch with Lori not too long ago. During quarantine I’ve been resurrecting some recordings of songs I abandoned back around 2002, and I knew some of them would be perfect for her to sing on. I messaged her in July 2020 to see if she had the capability to record harmonies down in Kansas, where she now lived. I knew others who could do it, I said, but I wanted to ask her first.
She said she didn’t have the gear to make that happen, and it made her sad. But she was touched by the request, and would have liked to do it. I decided to table the matter to see about it when travel was more of an option post-COVID. And again, I’m happy we had such kind words for each other in what turned out to be the last time we corresponded.
Lori was the kind of person who truly left a mark. I'll carry her joy and humor forward as long as I'm lucky enough to keep living. We'll miss you, Lori.