ALCHEMY & THE CHIPMUNKS

I want to thank my friend Eric Ziegenhagen for notifying me about this artifact. He and I have great enthusiasm for hypothetical dirge-tempo remakes of popular songs— long story— so he was on the red phone to let me know as soon as he discovered this.

I’ve always found it interesting that since the Chipmunks’ voices are recorded at normal speed and then sped up to the point of being unrecognizable, the performers themselves could be almost anyone who can carry a tune— and, over the years, they probably have been been. Hundreds of people with wildly varying vocal timbres could have played the parts of the Chipmunks over time, though the brand has remained sonically consistent.

So of course I was fascinated to hear this collection of their songs slowed down, which reveal that yes, the vocals are varied and often not exactly all that compelling at their original speed. What really knocked me out, though, was the lugubrious grind of the tracks, as if slowing down the tapes to 1/16 of their original speed unlocked a den of sluggish doom-rock.

Once the mystery of the vocals had been revealed, I found myself most interested in the voiceless passages. The “Call Me” instrumental brings to mind Goblin’s “Dawn of the Dead” soundtrack, the intro of “Walk Like An Egyptian” recalls Big Black’s “Bad Houses”, “My Sharona” plunges into a murk reminiscent of Butthole Surfers’ “Graveyard”, and Tom Petty’s “Refugee” generally sounds like a sedated “Rust Never Sleeps”-era Crazy Horse trying to find some common ground with a drowsy Joy Division.

So if this appeals to you, jump on in and savor the doom-rock stylings of Alvin and the Chipmunks! Enjoy.

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